So this is the new year...

Every year it's the same.

We all get together, drink too much, feel crappy the next day, and by 4pm, we've forgotten our resolutions. (If we've even made any.)

I think there's too much pressure associated with the New Year's Resolution. I mean, how realistic is it really to decide that, just because the calendar starts over, we all need to instantly decide to change things in our lives that - considering we haven't already changed them - we don't really have a good chance of changing about ourselves because, most likely, it's just a big part of who we are by nature? Or habit? We set ourselves up for failure by setting the bar so high.

Now don't get me wrong, I don't have a problem with goal-setting. I don't disagree with tradition. I don't dislike the idea of starting over. (In fact, I think may last post was about that exact topic.) I just think it's unrealistic and unfair to our own sanity to try and change overnight. And to change so much! Think about what most peoples' resolutions are: quitting smoking, losing weight, saving money, ceasing to quote Seinfeld episodes in social situations (that one was my sister's)... These are big deals to most people, and chances are they're a result of behavior or circumstances that are so frequent in peoples' every day that to try and transform on command seems insane.

And yet, we make resolutions every year.

I think the key is to not make such a big deal out of it. I think when we convince ourselves that so much rides on these promises that we can't help but fail, and then we all but die from the guilt of that failure, no matter how big or small. It shouldn't be a matter of a date on a schedule, but a strength of resolve that comes from inside each and every one of us.

So why am I writing all this? I recently made what most would call a resolution. But really it was more of a decision. I just decided I would do it. And I did. And now it's just something I'm doing. It's not the end-all-be-all of my day to day. It's not even on my calendar. It's not scheduled or penciled in. It's not the first thing I think of in the morning or the last thing I think of at night. It's just something that I do now.

And you know what? The pressure I'm not putting on myself is making the best difference in my ability to actually do what I've set out to do. And all of a sudden I'm doing things I've wanted to do all along...just naturally because of what I decided to do. Like writing in this journal. Or updating my website. :) Sort of. The point is that I'm giving myself a chance to be successful by going easy on myself.

At least once a week, I find myself whispering, "Rome wasn't built in a day."

I am Rome. And I am still a hell of a work in progress.



(But today, some 2x4s went up, and the place is really starting to look like an empire...)